Need some advice on a complex relationship problem?

Please..no messin' im really upset over this!


When i met my partner,one of his best friends was another woman.To cut out all the details,as marks girlfriend,i strongly sensed that 'at the drop of a hat',there 'friendship' could be more and yes,god forgive me..i was a little jealous.


As time passed and i would hear him tell her he 'loved her tons' in a 'freindyish sort of way' but he never said a 'man to woman' i love you to me!!.


Anyway,as my instinct grew stronger i asked mark if he would stop seeing %26amp; contacting her,of which he promised.


A few years later,me and mark had started a family etc and this girl put an ad in our local newspaper looking for mark..Again he promised not to act on it as it hurt me so much.However,to cut a long story short,he lied to me and phoned her in secret and i only found out through his phone bill.Now,a ex-worker of marks has mentioned this girl hinting that mark had called her,been calling her all the time or plain gone %26amp; seen her behind my back!.Need some advice on a complex relationship problem?
my sister~ my answers are bit spiritual so forgive me if I offend you. You are not married to this man right? You have children with him but he is not your husband? This may be hard to swallow but when you live in sin, there are no 'rules'. Its like being in satan's house and you're trying to tell him what the rules are going to be in his house. Your fears are real, your jealousy is justified..but ultimately, you are just the 'baby momma'. If he's not put a ring on your finger in all this time, that conveys ALOT of what he thinks of the relationship..even without this girl involved. She could very well be the thorn in your side but unless you are prepared to demand a lifelong God ordained commitment, then you have to live with the half hearted, fuzzy commitment that comes with living in sin.Need some advice on a complex relationship problem?
Ask him bout it and if its on the phone bill he cant denie it.....but he was good friends with her b4 you, you should of never made him choose, he chose you so be happy..Maybe he missed his friend and wanted to catch up on old times, to see how she was doing ect
okay well im kinda torn on this one because i know how you feel but i also know how he feels! if i were you i wouldve been jealous also! i wouldnt want my man talking to another women like that! but i have also been made to give up freinds that i hold very dear and to be honest i do hold some resentment towards my partner because of that! in this day and age its hard to trust someone! but to have a successful relationship you have to! i feel as if im bein a hypocrit because i too am very possesive over my man! there are too many homewreckers in this world not to be! but you just got to remember that its YOU that hes coming home to! my advice wold to be to sit down with him and have a very open conversation if you both truly love each other then comprimises have to b made!! good luck! %26lt;3
Sounds like he's got the hots for her, what can I say.
Confront him about it, proof in hand with the hpone bill. Either way, if it's true that he's seen her behind your back, divorce him. I think there's absolutely no room for something like that in a relationship. Obviously he's rising your marriage and family to see her and that shows that he's not commited to you and your relationship and you should get out.
You are horrible. You took away his next best friend after you because you assumed that he might start a relationship with her, even though he was clearly with you. You told him never to speak to her again.





Now she seeks him out and you have the nerve to be upset that he is seeing his friend behind your back.





In all good conscience, he should dump you. You are selfish and controlling. I feel sorry for him. Your instincts as you call them are to dominate and control this man, not to love, respect and cherish him.





Not every other woman is the enemy. You created a competition and you are losing. I hope you are proud of yourself.





Take care and Grow Up,


Troy
He NEVER should have stopped talking to her in the first place. This woman was a friend to him BEFORE You. How dare you ask him to get rid of a friend because of your insecurities. He is hiding the fact that he talks to a friend...you have no proof of anything else. MOST of my very good friends are guys...there is one that tells me he loves me every time we hang up and I love him as nothing more than a very damn good friend. Get a grip lady
he sounds like a headache and alot of drama, get out before you get seriously hurt. good luck
Seems to me this has gone way past bedtime. I would let him know this isn't acceptable to me, and I've entertained it for far too long and it needs to stop. How would he feel if you betrayed his trust by talking to another man that he didn't want you to continue to have contact with - trust is an important element in a relationship and the foundation which the strength of the relationship is based on -- cause if you can't trust someone you're with, why should you be with them?
Remember Princes Diana..?


this sounds a lot like her story but you can fix it tell your self it is OK this friendship you have to understand they were friends before you came in the picture but guess what he choose you.





What I would do is try to acknowledge the friendship that they have but remind him he did commit to you and now she is a mutual friend so instead of pushing her away invite her for dinner and get to know her pretend she is a friend of the family after a while this friendship is not going to feel the same to him and they both would grow apart life keeps going and for sure she is going to find her way but you have to defend what it is yours and to do so you have to be clever..
Well, regardless of it this co-worker is lying or not, you saw the phone bill for yourself. He lied to you..plain and simple.
You should not keep him from a friend that he loves dearly. That is selfish. You should trust him enough to allow them to be together and enjoy their friendship. The jealousy you feel is your own insecurity that you are handing to your husband. If you haven't given up your friends for him, then it is selfish to make him give up his. He should call her because they are friends. He should not have to worry about your insecurity. If you would have been understanding in the first place, he would not have to have gone behind your back. You need to examine your self-esteem and self-worth.
Ask him if he is calling her. If he is then tell him how you feel and then tell him that his friendship with her is going to be at the cost of your family. Or you could put an add in the paper asking her to stop messing with your family and partner. That might work.
some guys have strong friendships with girls, he may be asking her what to do with you!!!!! never come between friends,
that is some sneeky stuff! I believe everyone deserves one chance. I would confront him and tell him it is over if he continues to see her. If he messes up, kick him to the curb and get yourself a divorce because, once a cheater, always a cheater!!!